A Gnostic Fable
I awoke in a stark, white, room. With a bright, surgical light burning directly into my retinas.Pain stabbed through my brain like a blunt knife. I sat up, in order to evade it, and in doing so registered three things: My bare feet, white hospital issue pyjamas and an even more intolerable pain in the left side of my chest. I looked down beneath my top and beheld a long wound sutured with black wire. The wound itself was a crusty, black scab, with the odd bit of crimson juice oozing here and there, while the surrounding contusions were of a livid purple hue.
I alighted off the surgical table and shod my feet in the plain, white slippers provided and caught sight of my death's-head reflection in what I took to be a huge blacked out window. Not a pretty sight. Oyster eyes, blue lips, anaemic pallor. When I inadvertently touched the window while contemplating the wraith before me, something most peculiar happened. The window was illuminated and revealed its true purpose. This was no window but a two way mirror. Through which I recognised, to my ultimate horror all of my social acquaintances. They were rather well oiled and enjoying an obviously swinging party. This was, by no means the best any of them had ever looked, but they were at least well attired and moreover, looked happy. I shouted to attract their attention, then screamed and finally beat feebly with my blue-nailed hands against the glass. To no avail. I noticed a free-standing steel lamp with a solid base. Summoning all my strength I picked it up and swung it, straight through the pane, instantly shattering all their illusions.
They were at first astounded, which quickly gave way to amusement as I began to denounce my anonymous captors. "look what they did to me!" I cried plaintively, as I rent my garment to expose my scar. "It's alright love" said Jemima, kindly. Jemima was more of an acquaintance than a friend, which in truth they all were. She then unbuttoned a 60's style paisley shirt, to reveal an old grey scar. It was in exactly the same location on her body as mine. Everyone in the room quickly followed suit. "see we've all had it done, the doctors have found you can live without it, it causes you so much grief, you'll soon find you don't miss it" Beamed Jemima maniacally, as if she just been trepanned by an enthusiastic friend wielding a Black and Decker drill.
I looked down once more, as I did so a wave of ultimate dread came over me. A faint old scar was visible beneath my new one, slightly larger that my most recent mutilation. "Oh my God, no! No! I screamed as the room full of erstwhile lovers, teachers, classmates, colleagues et al erupted into laughter. "They've put it back, they've cleaned it up and put it back...! I jumped through the cavity which from their side looked like a huge regency style mirror, bolted across the ornately decorated room and seized the door handle.
I found myself in a long narrow corridor, lined with dark stained oak and hung with generic landscapes. I ran the length of the corridor, curiously, no one gave chase. I continued across the black and white marble tiled floor of the hall and out through the heavy, oak front door. All the while fighting for breath. my adrenaline carried me forward, as I ran past a small fountain in the grounds to a small wooded area. I looked up, the moon was full like a great, hammered silver dish. I was cold and numb, I collapsed.
When I awoke the sun was on my face. Although I no longer had a face. when I came to awareness I realised that I was in fact a large, black lotus flower with a crimson stamen. On top of which was a small, round fruit. My immediate neighbours were to my right, a splendid pomegranate tree dripping with scarlet fruit and to my left an apple tree, groaning beneath the weight of its golden adornments.
I could on occasion hear them converse as I could all the things in the vast garden. The lichens, flowers, toadstools, trees, birds, animals and of course the Man and Woman.
I however, was unique and had on this account been assigned a guardian by the powers that be. He was a great long black snake, with a green hood and stripe down his back. his eyes were like two Burmese rubies and his name was Lucifer. The Man and Woman were not particularly bright and had developed an unhealthy curiosity about me. Particularly regarding the juicy crimson fruit growing from my stamen. Whenever they ventured too near and looked as if they were going to touch me, all I could do to defend myself was snap shut my petals. Lucifer, being both a snake and a preternatural being always sensed this and with lightening speed wrapped his coils around me rearing up and fanning out his hood. "Get back, get back! The Holy One Blessed Be He has forbidden it!" The Man and Woman merely grunted, as they were rather unevolved, their communication skills still markedly inferior compared with the gardens' other residents. The lichens were very musical and composed rudimentary trance music by means of sub-sonic sound pulses. The lone Porpoise who dwelt in the lake had invented his own private language, much to the consternation of the fish. I you must understand was omniscient, therefore I understood all. Lucifer was the wisest animal in the garden and it was his unenviable task to keep in check the moronic humans. One day Lucifer was coiled at the edge of the lake, on the cusp of a breakthrough with the Porpoise {I, though omniscient was sadly mute} when the humans seized their opportunity. The fruit on my stamen was ripe, so ripe, sometimes when the wind blew, I could look up through it at the sky. It was like observing the world through a candy wrapper.
The Woman had tied a broken vine to a branch of the apple tree and swung down snatching the fruit from my stamen. The only distinctive thing about it was the line, dividing the two hemispheres of my fruit. She ingested it, but swallowed only one half, retaining the other in her mouth. She then kissed The Man and in doing so he assimilated my juicy pulp. What followed was most peculiar. I was now the Man and the Woman. I looked upon her with desire and got an erection. I looked at him with insatiable hunger and all the time it was like looking in the mirror. It was the strangest, most Onanistic feeling I had ever experienced. The phrase 'go fuck yourself' leapt into mind. Yet it was also wonderful and I copulated and ejaculated and fertilised myself. At which point we fused and I was Man and Woman no longer but a singularity, namely a zygote, developing in the Woman's womb.
Upon his return Lucifer, seeing my erstwhile abode realised what had occurred. His suspicions were confirmed when the formerly dull-witted Woman {now wearing a coconut shell bra and banana leaf knickers} engaged him in conversation. " we now know why you guarded your charge so jealously, it contained the source of all knowledge and pleasure." When Lucifer gathered my withered remains in his coils they crumbled to dust and blew away with the breeze. Sapphire tears flowed from his ruby eyes and his heart sank in his scaly breast. "You were to be fed the berry at the appointed time on the day of your investiture. you were to be led before the stone altar and I was to intone hymns and every animal in the garden was to sing in reply. Various flowers and fruits were to be brought as offerings to the Lord, and upon his instruction you were to be fed the berry by the Holy Dove. As it is you have defied the Holy One and prematurely brought about your awakening. While you have sinned in ignorance he shall be more wrath with me, for I have failed in the discharge of my duties."
"When" laughed the Woman scornfully, "were we to have been fed the berry in this fanciful ceremony?"
"No one knows the hour but The Holy One, not even I. I was trying to see if the Porpoise would sing when the time came. He has, unsurprisingly, despite his many difficulties, no trouble comprehending the universal music of the sacred".
"We have only your word for this snake! Shouted the previously silent Man, {now wearing a banana leaf loin cloth} how do we know you weren't just keeping the berry for yourself?"
"Because I could already speak and even yet enjoy a superior level of awareness to you!"
With this the Man lunged at Lucifer, he reared and fanned out his hood, about to strike, when a gentle breeze blew and all things became still. The Holy Dove descended and spake thus:
"Lucifer, do not strike this man, hold your forked tongue while I pronounce judgement.
The snake bowed before the Holy Dove, who was now perched in the bower of the pomegranate tree.
"You Lucifer were remiss in the discharge of your duties, owing to excessive pride in your gifts. You so adore hearing yourself sing, more so in front of an audience, that you neglected your primary duty. That of guarding the Sacred Lotus. As a consequence, the unripe creatures have come too early to fruition. Being a seasoned experimenter, I always make provision for such a possibility. However, I will now, in my capacity as Paraclete have to legislate for the consequences".
"You Man and Woman, will have to vacate the garden and inhabit a place more conducive to your development".
"But, contested the Man, we sinned in ignorance. Surely a sin in ignorance is no sin at all?"
"Please, understand, continued The Holy Dove. This is not a punishment, you have dictated the course of your own development. From my point of view this is rather exciting, as when I dictate the run of play, things tend to be rather predictable. You have given me cause to marvel, your species is one in need of a challenge, I therefore propose the following: Relocation: All your fundamental needs have been met here in the garden, even in your primitive state you were growing weary of interminable perfection. Immortality, feeling wonderful forever, was obviously the cause of the deranging ennui, which lead to the premature consumption of the aforementioned Lotus Fruit.
That coupled with an almost exclusively fruitarian diet, both fresh and fermented, has obviously played havoc with your rudimentary circuits. They need oiling. To solve this problem I propose a detachment from nature, you will begin to compete with and as a consequence predate other creatures. Loss of empathy is therefore essential.
"Forgive the interruption, interjected Lucifer now animated, but what is to become of me?"
"Ah, you are to be put to work". Smiled the Dove.
"To work?" Replied the bemused snake.
" Yes, I have no desire to destroy the harmony I have established here in the garden, what I have decided to do is give you an outlet for you creativity, a captive audience to inhabit a world dressed according to your design".
"You mean?" said Lucifer breathlessly
"I mean you too will leave the garden, though you may return periodically to make the odd progress report and for the occasional sabbatical.
You will be put into an identical copy of the garden. You, Lucifer will rule it as a principality, sow discord and act as the agent of diffusion. Playing the bass notes, if you will. You will cast confusing shadows and disrupt communication between the newborn race of Men and the rest of nature.
"They chose to pit themselves against you in the first place, I will therefore, provide you with an arena, a theatre worthy of your genius, what say you Lucifer?
"What of the gateway between my territory and yours?"
" Why you will guard it of course. At the time of physical death the worthy descendants of Mankind will come to the interstice in order to re-enter the original garden. Before they can pass through the narrow gate they must wrestle you. Only those who have strengthened their resolve through meditation, purified their minds and mortified their flesh stand a chance of overcoming you.
Hence there will be many incarnations".
" I see, so some will get past me?" Said Lucifer, almost disappointed.
" All will eventually, when they are sufficiently evolved." Replied the Dove with a knowing smile on her beak.
Lucifer Knew better than to ask when that would be.
The woman was now indignant and railed at the Dove. " What of the seed which grows in my belly?"
" Your seed will know nothing but the new world and you will quickly forget when you have been there long enough. All that shall remain is a vestigial memory".
Before any more protestations could be made, The Man, The Woman and Lucifer were all escorted from the garden by The Holy Dove, who flapped her wings and duplicated the universe.
The Serpent was now alone with The Man and Woman. He was also in charge.
"My first act will be to remind you of my mandate, before you forget. I, Lucifer, The Rainbow Serpent, Guardian Of The Dreamtime, Midwife Of Chaos....Chaos hmmm would be an apposite name for the child you carry, alas The Holy One has forbidden it. Apparently the child will have enough to contend with. As I was saying, I imagine your numerous primitive creation myths will traduce and slander at first, then libel, when you start writing things down about me. As your half-remembered version of events is muddled to infinity with every re-telling.
"Know then this of me: I am your adversary, not your enemy, your chief enemy will not be me, nor the elements, nor the ferocious beasts which lie in wait to devour you. You have no enemy but your own will, which if channelled correctly is marvellous asset, remember my little wards, you came here as a consequence of choice."
The Woman was now experiencing labour pangs and shouted to the Snake for mercy, to appeal to the Dove for mercy or to defy her altogether. He looked at her with his ruby coloured eyes and made his sad reply: I failed in my duty once before and came to grief, I will not squander my redemption. I must heed her voice not yours, henceforth you will come to regard all snakes as deaf, as I am now forced to be deaf to your pleas.
"Will we still hear you?" asked the Man desperately.
"Not I, nor any other creature in the garden, the only thing you may occasionally hear is the whispering of The Holy Dove. Though in time you will come to doubt that".
I heard and curiously, saw all this from my front row seat, inside the woman. I was now engaged, ready to be born.
" What of my child?" shouted the Woman, now terrified.
" Accustom her to the sting of the cold, insects, nettles, a flagellant's whip and above all disappointment, only the stings of the aforementioned will afford you any immunity, at the appointed hour to my sting. the worst thing you will have to endure is the aftertaste of the berry. It will linger in the mouths of your descendants as long as they inhabit the earth. They'll have no idea how it got there and will encounter more pain trying to eliminate this taste than by any other means".
With this he grew a pair of enormous, gorgeous wings, alive with every hue and flew away, out of sight. The Woman began to curse the snake, as she did so her waters broke.
I awoke myself, 27 years old, lying on a hammock slung between two large trees in my back garden. One a willow the other an oak. I was wet. I had evidently spilled apple and pomegranate juice over myself some time ago which had attracted a wasp. The wasp was now dead, crushed against the throbbing left side of my chest. I glanced momentarily to my right, and espied an adder basking in the sun. The serpent, perceiving my slight movement turned, looking me straight in the eye, before dragging his languid length off between two fence posts, into the undergrowth. As far as I could discern it had no preternatural abilities, then again, how would I know?
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